I literally have had to be in some kind of conflict all day long. I hate confrontation, I hate conflict. I am a peacemaker--why won't anyone let me make some peace dang it!! I was feeling pretty sorry for myself on the hand I got dealt for a little bit and I thought of how a friend mentioned that she knows that through blessings she has been given her kids for a specific reason. It then occurred to me as I finally sat down at 10pm after many struggles and battles from various children that I am learning from this and this is what I need to stretch me and make me grow. If I had a house full of peaceful submissive people than I would never really have to step outside my comfort zone.
It comes natural for me to show affection to my kids but it doesn't come natural for me to set those firm boundaries and stick to it despite the storm that it creates. It comes natural for me to follow but not to lead. It comes natural for me to be completely passive and indecisive and not confident and consistent. Yet everyday I am forced to do all those things that I hate or live in utter chaos. I really believe my kids were sent to me to make me strong--they are some hardcore personal trainers that have me on a very regimented daily workout schedule. Unfortunetly they aren't the workouts that help me fit in my old pants :)
2 comments:
It is said that if you don't laugh, you cry. I think it's awesome that you are trying to shift your attitude about the hand you were dealt.
You are learning and growing through your stretching and struggling. Good luck with this workout schedule! I think you will eventually come to like the fit of your new pants. :)
Besides, you help others as they deal with their own kids. I don't know if you realize what an inspiration you are, Heather! You give me hope to continue on with my own parental workout.
You're doing an awesome job. Keep up the good work, it's worth it in the end!
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